Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Parents should train kids assertiveness, to deal with school bullying problem, and for later social success


Today (December 24) “Michelle” (I did not get the last name) made a presentation on “raising assertive kids” on the NBC Tday show. One of the most remarkable statements in her presentation was that kids need to learn assertiveness in order to deal with bullies and avoid falling into an existential trap. (I wondered where the responsibility of school administrators lies, and I thought about Dr. Phil’s recent program on that topic, as well as his son Jay’s book..)

She advised letting kids be independent, even at 2. Don’t pick up the pieces for them, don’t speak for them, and praise them when they speak for themselves. She said to train kids to make eye contact, to the point that they can see eye color. She indicated that birth order is important: oldest children are often the most assertive and wind up becoming CEO’s (or maybe politicians). I don’t know if that’s always true; later born children often take more risks in life.

Frank McGinty has an “Assertive Kids” home page dated Christmas eve here.

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